OVERCOMING NEGATIVE THOUGHTS

 I am sharing my experience with one of my coaching clients who wanted to work on her future career. She cannot decide which route to take, either corporate or research in academia. When we are about to conclude, she will revisit using the word ‘but’ and get confused. I learned in this conversation that it’s not that she cannot make up her mind, but negative thoughts are her barrier. We started working on that and ended up successful.  I am sharing the techniques used to create her awareness about the situation and develop an action plan.

Your thoughts will influence your words, which determines your actions. Your actions will define the habits which make up your character. Your character will determine your destiny. Learn to master your thoughts.

While unpleasant or undesired ideas are frequent, they can hinder you from enjoying situations, divert your attention away from what is truly important, and drain your vitality. Additionally, they can make you feel worried and depressed.

Recognize cognitive dissonances.

If you can identify them, you can develop the ability to confront them. The following are four common cognitive distortions:


  • Thinking in black-and-white terms. Perceiving everything as either one or the other, with no in-between.
  • Personalizing. Assuming that you are to fault for everything that goes wrong, such as believing that someone did not smile at you because you angered her
  • Filter your thoughts. Choosing to focus exclusively on the negative aspects of a situation.
  • Catastrophizing. Assuming the worst-case scenario will occur.

 

Confront negative mental patterns

·       When you have a skewed thought, pause to determine its accuracy. Consider how you would react if a friend described themselves in that manner

·       Consider whether you are assuming the worst or blaming yourself for something that did not go as planned. And then consider other outcomes or reasons why something did not work out as planned.

 

Give yourself a vacation from negative thinking


·       It is possible to develop the ability to detach from unpleasant ideas. Allowing oneself a particular length of time (maybe five minutes) with the concept is one approach to accomplish this. Then take a break from it and go about your day.

 

 

 

Abandon judgment


·       Several techniques for overcoming judgmental thoughts involve identifying your own reaction, watching it, and then letting it go. Another advantageous strategy is “positive judgment.” When you become aware that you are passing judgment on someone, yourself, or a situation, look for good quality as well

 

Develop an attitude of thankfulness


·       Gratitude has been shown to have a significant effect on one’s level of positivity and happiness, according to research. Even if you are going through a difficult moment in your life, you can generally find something to be grateful for (even if it is small)

 

Concentrate on your advantages


·       If you find yourself having negative thoughts about your personality or conduct, pause for a moment and consider anything you appreciate about yourself.

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